SELECTION OF FUNNY SOTRY
In a terrible battle against a raging lion, Tarzan loses an eye , an arm and his penis. The animals of the jungle and the nurse him back to life.
They grafted him a hawk eye , an arm of the gorilla and the cock they take the trunk of a baby elephant.
After a week of convalescence he returned home and found Cheetah.
" And your plugins , what do you think ? " she asked "Eye good Tarzan see far and clear ... good arm ... long and hard ... but not very satisfied Tarzan new tail ... all day picking grass and stuff in ass Tarzan.
In Africa, three white (say, French , Canadian and Belgian ) are leaning on a bar and sip their whiskey. Suddenly, the door opens with a bang and a huge black 2 meters, built like a bulldozer enters the bar . He approaches the French , he drinks his glass and said:
- Me , white women , I fuck!
- No problem, that's cool! meets the green french funk .
Then the black will approach the Canadian , he drinks his glass and said:
- Me , white women , I fuck!
- This is super cool for you , says the Canadian stammering .
Finally, the black approaches the Belgian , he drinks his glass and said again :
- Me , white women , I fuck!
- You're right , meets the Belgian , I also found the disgusting black women ...
An American farmer has lost his brave rooster. He then went to the market but is a little late , unfortunately. It begins to look roosters remain but there is more than one, skinny , half sprawled on the edge of his cage. He goes to the owner and asked him:
- How you ask for cock?
- $ 500
- $ 500 ! ! Are you sick ?
- Ho there , beware friend. This cock is one of the largest specimen of its kind. It is able to make your hens, no rooster is capable of doing . Saying he has nothing to lose, our farmer pays and takes his cock.
Drove home , it loose in his backyard and then will feed the animals in the barn . Suddenly, he heard a terrible noise : v'la ti'pa the cock is fucking chickens at a breakneck pace ! After his incredible fucking , cock falls to the ground , eyes closed.
The farmer , groans , says :
- Well, I have done ! This cock is already nothing!
The next day, wake up , the farmer still hear a terrible noise coming from the farm. He looks out the window and sees his cock putting rabbits and turkeys ! Again, after his incredible fucking , cock falls to the ground , eyes closed.
The farmer , groans , says :
- Well, this time for sure , I have done ! This cock is worthless !
The following morning , same scenario. The cock pops everything that moves in the farm: cows, pigs , chicken ... then collapses. Vultures begin to turn around the farm in the sky. The farmer arrives at a run and starts screaming :
- My poor cock! My God ...
Then the rooster opens one eye, one wing tip to the sky and whispered to the farmer :
- Tssss ! Shut ! You'll scare them !
That's three samurai who want to measure their address saber. They choose a judge who will guarantee the fairness of the game which will take place between 3 warriors.
The judge who knows tournament Samurai brought them something to measure : It opens a small box in which there is a fly.
Katana samurai out of its sheath in a flash, and the fly falls to the ground , cut in half !
The judge is satisfied with the first performance , and he congratulated the first samurai. When the second samurai is ready , the judge opens a new box and let fly another fly .
This time , the second gives two samurai saber in the air and fly falls , cut into four !
This time , the judge was very impressed . And he says the second samurai. But there is a third competitor. When it is ready , the judge opens its third box containing a third fly ...
The samurai takes out his sword and draws an arabesque in the air, and puts his sword , but the fly continues to fly ... The judge said:
- But the fly is still alive !
- That's right, meets the third samurai , but it can never happen again.
118 - Three shipwrecked on a desert island ...
A French and a Belgian couple .
The French thought he must find a solution to "his" loneliness and decides baratiner Belgians .
The French : - Let see , you know it was worth a moment before going on a boat ...
Belgian : - Alley, but it's true what he says
French: - So here's what I propose . To be sure not to miss any boat should keep watch from above a tree
Belgian : - Well , it's not as stupid idea, you say
OK so I started the French and goes upward palm , -: the French .
It is not that there is 5 minutes he shouted to the Belgians:
- Hey down, it is not because I see no need to enjoy!
Belgian : - What did he say? But I do not say what it means ! 5 minutes later , same thing:
French: - So band salaupiots ! this is not just done to send in the air?
Belgian : - Alley, alley , what it can say ? But I do not understand what he says this Castard ...
After an hour, punctuated every 5 minutes by the injunctions of the French , it comes down and says:
- Go to the Belgian, it's your turn to get on the palm for the watch !
Belgian and climbs up the tree ... Alone with the Belgian woman , the French soon leads to the spiel and he makes ... From the top of the tree, the Belgian looks , sees that goes down and said:
" Well, it's still true that here it looks like they fuck ...
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